The power of rituals can be more powerful than you know. Think of the times you’ve been most stressed, perhaps in grief or in an overwhelming family moment. Sometimes, we freeze; we simply don’t know what to do with ourselves. We return, then, to whatever...
It’s that time of year again…summer has officially slipped away to leave room for golden leaves, crisp mornings, and pumpkin spice everything. Autumn is upon us, and personally, I am thrilled. There’s something so magical about watching the seasons change, and...
Did you know that there is one element of all relationships that, if it’s gone, the Gottman’s research shows it’s time to pull the plug on the relationship? And it’s not some of the things you might expect. It’s not sex, it’s not...
You may have noticed that in these posts, we often reference something called the CVI: the Core Values Index. The CVI is the first human assessment that measure the innate, unchanging nature in each of us. It has the highest testability of any ‘personality test’ there...
You know that we are big fans of the Gottmans here at Core Values Counseling. Sabrina is a certified Gottman therapist, and she’s even a trainer, helping other counselors get that same certification. So we love keeping up on all the great tools the Gottmans come out...
What are some unique ways you love to spend time with your partner? Eric and I love long road trips. Just getting in the car and driving to a far-off destination, with nothing but long, scenic highway stretches between us and a new adventure. Those long stretches...
We think of play and playfulness as something only for children, but experts consistently agree: play is essential for adults’ physical health, mental aptitude, relational closeness, and overall sense of well-being. Which means play is a powerful thing, an...
Recently my team of counselors all went through the Gottman Level 3 training; for some of us, it was a revisiting of topics we’d covered before, and for some it was totally new. But even though I’d done this training before, something new stood out to me (it always...
Photo by Tonik on Unsplash This past year has been a test of all of our mental health. What with a pandemic, wild fires, many personal losses, social unrest, political divides, and now record high temperatures…well, if you were immune to anxiety before this...
Have you ever found yourself in a train station when nobody is there? How about an empty parking lot at night? Or the back stairwell in your office building that no one really uses? Do you ever notice how these spaces have a feeling of strangeness to them?...
With the passing of another Independence Day, I can’t help but be reminded of something the Gottmans teach. That might seem a strange connection to you — after all, what exactly does independence have to do with healthy relationships? Excellent question....
Four of our six therapists over at Core Values Counseling have recently been trained in a mode of therapy called EMDR. EMDR stands for “Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing,” and it’s used in therapy to help process trauma. It’s quite...
We all are exhausted from the pandemic and the varying emotions we have experienced in the past year — but that’s exactly why harnessing your emotional intelligence has never been more important. We’re all feeling stretched thin, so expecting others to know what you...
Whenever there has been a breach of trust in a relationship, the offended partner will experience triggers at the most unexpected and sometimes inopportune moments. “Why are you looking at your phone?” “Where are you going?” “What are you...
Watch the video here. One of the most essential parts of living in relationship — whether that’s a partner, child, friend, roommate, or coworker — is knowing how to apologize. We all mess up. We all make mistakes. And we all disappoint each other....
Is there anything more joyful than sharing good news with your partner? I got the job! I aced the test! We got the house! It’s a boy! Sharing in the joy of triumph, accomplishment, or good fortune is all the sweeter with a partner to celebrate with us. Getting...
It’s officially been a year since all this really got started. A year since I’ve stopped seeing clients in person (telehealth appointments are available for those interested), a year since we all started wearing masks, a year since — most significant for many of us —...
“Our human compassion binds us the one to the other – not in pity or patronizingly, but as human beings who have learnt how to turn our common suffering into hope for the future.” – Nelson Mandela After the year we’ve had, who wants to bother dreaming? Who wants...
Photo by Ben White on Unsplash There’s no denying the holidays are different this year. The pandemic has put a wrench in everything, and while hope is certainly on the horizon, a lot of us will be unable to participate in the traditions we’re used to....
Whether your family is getting together in person or over Zoom this holiday season, family conflict can always be a particular stressor. As 2020 draws to a close, that might be more true this year than ever before — when even the discussion of when and how to...
