Can you believe it’s almost the end of September? If you’re a parent with kids at home, you’re likely a couple weeks into the new school year (at least, you are if you’re in the Portland, Oregon area!). I hope you’ve found your groove and that the transition has gone well. But if it hasn’t, that’s okay! Today, I’d like to offer some gentle parenting guidance to help you and your kids find the equilibrium you deserve!
At the start of the school year, many parents experience a mix of excitement and anxiety about their child’s transition into this new chapter. Gentle parenting embraces the importance of nurturing strong bonds while encouraging our children’s independence. It’s a delicate balance, especially when it comes to starting the school year.
Understanding Gentle Parenting and Attachment
At its heart, gentle parenting draws from the principles of attachment parenting, which emphasizes being attuned to our child’s emotional and physical needs. In those early years, our children thrive on our closeness and support. However, gentle parenting also encourages us to foster our child’s ability to explore and grow independently.
When the time comes for our little ones to head off to preschool or kindergarten (or college!), it can stir up a whirlwind of emotions for both parents and children. The thought of our child being away for a few hours can feel overwhelming. It’s perfectly normal to feel a mix of sadness, excitement, and even anxiety. Acknowledging these feelings — both ours and our children’s — is an important step in navigating this transition with grace.
Preparing for the Transition
Ideally, preparation for school should begin well before the first day. Talk about the upcoming changes with warmth and enthusiasm, whether your child is moving from summer fun back into school, transitioning from homeschooling, or stepping into a new grade. (If school has already started, you can still talk positively about the year ahead.) Encourage your child to share their feelings and thoughts about school, and validate their emotions along the way.
It goes without saying that all the same applies to your older kids, too. Transitions from elementary to middle school, middle school to high school, and high school to college, trade schools, or independent living can bring about a lot of changes! Your kids need your support at 18 just as much as they did when they were 8 (it just looks a little different now).
As a parent, it’s essential to be gentle with yourself, too. It’s okay to feel a bit sad as you reflect on the beautiful moments you’ve shared. You might say something like, “I’m feeling a little sad because I’ve loved our time together, but I’m also so excited for you to start this new adventure!” Sharing your emotions helps your child understand that it’s okay to feel a mix of joy and sadness.
I hope what I’ve shared here helps you begin to recalibrate for the new school year. In my next post, we’ll be discussing the importance of creating meaningful rituals with your kids and helping them express their emotions — both key pieces to the gentle parenting puzzle.
Photo by Krzysztof Kowalik on Unsplash
