The Art of Compromise (For When You Keep Having THAT Fight)

One of the essential elements of the Gottman Theory is the importance of finding a new way to talk about old problems. Their research shows that nearly 70% of all problems in any relationship are perpetual. That’s right — the argument you had the first year of marriage will probably be the one you’re having Read more about The Art of Compromise (For When You Keep Having THAT Fight)[…]

Five Things Your Partner With Anxiety Wants You To Know

If your partner has anxiety, sometimes it can be hard to understand. Things that wouldn’t stress you out make them feel overwhelmed, and your efforts to help, while well-intentioned, might not accomplish what you’re hoping. The most important thing is to talk about these issues, and ask your partner what works for them and what Read more about Five Things Your Partner With Anxiety Wants You To Know[…]

Establishing Rituals of Connection

Have you ever heard the term ‘Rituals of Connection’? These are the rituals you build into your life that connect you with your partner, habits that build relationships and encourage closeness. These rituals are always important in a romantic relationship, but perhaps exceptionally so after experiencing the trauma of an affair. As Eric and I know Read more about Establishing Rituals of Connection[…]

What To Do When Your Partner Won’t Comply

One of the toughest situations to be in relationally is when one person doesn’t see anything wrong with the relationship. They don’t see anything wrong with their behavior, or the way they’re treating you, even though you do — and this partner doesn’t want outside help. What do you do in that situation? Bend to Read more about What To Do When Your Partner Won’t Comply[…]

Creating A Safe Haven In Your Relationship

Sue Johnson lists three famous questions that, as she explains, every person needs to to be able to answer ‘Yes” to in order to feel secure in their relationship — and to be free with their love. The three questions are as follows: Are you there for me?   Do I matter? Will you come when I Read more about Creating A Safe Haven In Your Relationship[…]

Contempt: The Deadliest of the Four Horsemen

When things have really deteriorated in your relationship, a peculiar phenomenon can occur. You start to reside in what’s known as ‘negative sentiment override,’ which basically means you start to believe that your partner only thinks negatively of you. You believe that whatever they say is tinged with contempt of you — and you return that contempt in kind. The Gottmans have discovered Read more about Contempt: The Deadliest of the Four Horsemen[…]

Preparing For The Holidays: Settle For MORE

“There is more in us than we know if we could be made to see it; perhaps, for the rest of our lives we will be unwilling to settle for less.” – Kurt Hahn We’re often told that we should be willing to settle for less at the holidays: less business, less consumerism, less money spent, less Read more about Preparing For The Holidays: Settle For MORE[…]