Seven Signs You Might Be Having An Emotional Affair

If you’re a reader of this newsletter, it’s safe to assume you take fidelity pretty seriously. The last thing we want to fall into is an affair. But what many people don’t realize is that an emotional affair can be just as damaging as a physical one, although it might start with perfect innocence. If you[…]

Surviving An Affair Means: Taking Responsibility

Yesterday, I posted this video to our Facebook page about how some couples are able to survive affairs others aren’t. The professor they interviewed hit the nail on the head: getting through infidelity, together, is all about taking responsibility. Part of that is allowing the hurt partner the chance to heal by being truly transparent, vulnerable, honest. No blame of any kind[…]

Escape the Negative Cycle

When couples don’t see eye to eye, it’s easy to take offense, get defensive, shut down, put up walls, or even jump to worst case scenarios. Believe me, we all fall into one or more of these traps–even great marriages can slip into these negative cycles. They are our natural, human tendency, even though we know we need[…]

Rebuilding Trust After An Affair

When a couple is recovering from an affair, re-establishing trust is the key component. If you’ve been hurt by this betrayal, you are probably asking: will it ever get better? Will I ever be able to trust again? Sometimes, even in situations that weren’t an affair exactly–like porn addiction or substance abuse–can still feel just as devastating. In all these cases, building[…]

Recovering From An Affair

As a counselor and a coach, Sabrina and I are often asked, “How long will these feelings of hurt last?” That’s a tough question to answer. We offer a lot of resources for just that, and we also refer many couples to BeyondAffairs.com as another great source of counseling and classes through this process. Affairrecovery.com[…]

Let’s Talk About Freedom

Freedom! That’s what we celebrate this weekend, isn’t it? But what about freedom in our relationships? Well, the very best relational freedom is not that different from the freedom our country enjoys. Certainly we are independent from the sovereignty of the British government, but are we truly independent? I think not. It’s a global economy, after all, and[…]

Becoming Friends With Resistance…

When we feel that guttural urge to resist a suggestion, it often comes with a lot of discomfort. We don’t like the suggestion. We don’t want to do this. We might feel guilty about it, bringing even more resistance. That’s what happens with me when Eric wants me to budget better. Yes, this continues to[…]

Blessings are always better than Curses

Blessings are always better than curses. But sometimes it’s all you can do not to focus the curses in your life. The pastor who married us spent a good amount of time the day before our wedding talking to us about our parents and what “gifts or blessings” they had given us throughout our lives.[…]